Here’s a picture of a football coach. Instead of some generic dad who coaches his kid's Pop Warner team imagine that he’s Illinois head coach Ron Zook. And instead of having a handful of that kid’s jersey pretend he’s got GIANT bags of money ready to hand out to great receivers from across the damn country. Seen over on Deadspin this afternoon is this story about one Arrelious Benn. Highly sought after high school baller from D.C. Rivals.com has him ranked as the #1 receiver and 9th over-all playah. Trying to pick between ND and FSU. Illinois Arrelious? Really? It is with raised eyebrows (I wish I could do the one raised eyebrow trick like Mr. Spock) that I question his decision. Oh sure, Illinois is a program on the rise with a solid future ahead of them……Blah freaking Blah. The Candyman has come to Arrelious with open wallet. Just sayin’.
The Aforementioned Pregame Entry Commenceth.
Northwestern huh? Ryan Field in suburban Chicago. Ohio State is favored by twenty-something. Give the points to whomever will take them. This, dear reader, is going to be what I like to call an Ass Whoopin. Even Tressel-ball won’t be able to slow our boys down.
Butkus Award finalist and tattooed badass James “My dad isn’t the only one who can do an atomic elbow drop off the top turnbuckle” Laurinaitis will score. As will my boy Antonio Smith. That’s 2 TDs for the defense.
Take it to the bank. Plus, if I’m wrong, I can always just come back and edit this later.
tOSU – 38
NU – 10
Ok, Stop with the bald kitty jokes. You're better than that.